Sometimes I just can't think of a catchy title...

This may come as a surprise to you all, but I am a deeply divided and conflicted individual.

Not that you’d know it if you ran into me on the street, cause I appear mellow and mostly stoic and low key. But on the inside, things are bright white, inky black, and separated by more shades of gray than the combined fleets of the U.S. Navy, which is quite a lot let me tell you. Combine that with fire and ice, and an IMS (internal messaging system) that is hardwired to broadcast 24/7 a litany of deficiencies and self-expectations and there you go. Divided and conflicted.

Whoo boy…

I fouled something up really good at work yesterday. Much gnashing of teeth, rending of garments, and pulling of hair. Mine. I never foul anything up, I’m that good, or so I think. So when I do, the internal volume goes WAYYYY up. This morning is clean up, repair, fix. All will be well. One of my favorite sayings to the people that work for me is “good people never make mistakes, great ones make them, fix them, learn and move on”. I am a great motivator. Of course, I do not apply this outlook to myself, cause you know I think I might have a little double standard going on.

But fortunately, I realized something in the midst of fitful and interrupted cat-biting-toe sleep:

1.Shit happens
2.Self deprecation is self destruction by degrees.
3.Maintaining a sense of a much larger universe than my little bumps might be a healthy thing.

“people are flawed individuals, the cosmic bakers took us out of the oven a little too early..”

Yup. Maybe I’ll allow myself that. I do it for most everyone else, and the double standard thing? Exhausting.

So, it’s gonna be a good day. I’m gonna clean up this little mess then see what else I can get into. And as of today, I declare this blog a “Self-Bashing Free Zone”. Which you are more than welcome to join in on.

“Fruitcakes in the kitchen
Fruitcakes on the street
Struttin naked through the crosswalk
In the middle of the week
Half-baked cookies in the oven
Half-baked people on the bus
Theres a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us”

Yes, indeedy. Cookies anyone?

Have a great day!

A few small repairs...

Thanks to the comment of the world-famous Anonymous, I fixed the gaping void link in the previous post. Which means now you can actually read it.

Raining like the end of days. A slish-slosh walk imminent.

Have a great morning!

Wisdom where I find it...

And a lot of it came my way today, maybe more on that later. But for now:

"Don’t rely on anyone or anything outside your own self to drive your happiness. It is up to no one but yours. When you own your happiness, no one can steal it, no one can buy it, and you don’t have to look elsewhere to find it." -Douglas Karr

(via the gaping void, which has a great series on 500 word manifestos running. I might even submit one if i can edit down to 500!)

And the best thing? This is not the best wisdom i received today, it only happens to be a snippet I can post. So I'm feeling pretty fortunate and illuminated this evening.

Have a good evening!

An update: (or, humor where i find it...)

Happy to report orange juice has been eclipsed mightly. The day is pretty good. Even on the workfront. Not crazed, just stuff to do.

Here, a portrait. Well, a work portrait...I would look like this if I was taller, more buff (buffer?), shaved, and put my silver hoop back in...



Did you know there's a Wikipedia entry for him? Is the internet amazing or what?

Bet it's hard to believe that I've gone to nuclear power school, sailed at least 5 of the seven seas, traveled all over the world, managed 6 divisions and a few million dollars in a corporate job for a number of years, was a network analyst, successfully owned and operated 3 small business enterprises and am a decent cook to boot. See, you never know what people's stories are...

Mine for now is finishing my rocket fuel coffee, and getting back to work. Oh how I love the smell of Scrubbing Bubbles and Simple Green in the morning...

Hope you all are having a great day!

Looking at today...

I had orange juice for breakfast. I fear that may be the highlight of the day.

sigh.

Hope yours is dramtically more enjoyable.

Poetry where I find it...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness which frightens us. Our playing small doesn't serve the world; there is nothing enlightening about shrinking so other people dont feel insecure around us. We were all meant to shine as children do; it's not just in some of us, its in everyone. And as we let our own light shine we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

(from the movie Coach Carter, apparently paraphrased from Marianne Williamson)

Well, hit me over the head, why don't you, Universe...

This one little quote should foul me up for about at week at least.

That, and my nearly unbearably slow internet connection....

Have a good evening.

News from the front...

or maybe the back?

Nothing bloggable, though I am thinking about some Very Important Things. Which may or may not surface here, first there must be clarity and understanding (which seems to be lacking of late) before communicating.

Today was fittered away nicely, another balmy(!) day on the mountaintop, lots of sun, warm, drinking industrial strength bloody mary's on the porch while watching the birds and soaking up the warmth with the dogs, all of us storing for the winter certain to come soon. This followed by food on the porch in the sun, some coffee, a lot of sitting and marveling, a bit of guilt-fueled work on the tractor (damn my work ethic!), followed by tuna steaks and asparagus done on the grill (yes, on the porch). All in all, a nice day.

Now finishing cleaning up, evening mundane routines done, and soon to bed, an early morning tomorrow, dayjob work etc. Have you heard the Tom Waits Heigh Ho song yet? Hysterical.

"It's off to work we go...."

Hope you all had a good weekend, feel full, rested and relaxed, and that the week ahead is good to you and for you.



Be well.

The Continuing Metaphor

My friend, The Tree. Previously known as the Demon Tree (first mentioned here) and throughout the year, if you care to fish through the archives. But we're getting along better these days.

All this sawed and split by my hand (I am nothing if not tenancious)...at least this much more to go. The current stack is about 10 feet long, 4 feet high and 4 feet deep, a little more than a cord. It might be getting near time to rent a splitter, least I grow older at an accelerated rate.

I should take this show on the road; saw, mauls, axes for hire. It could finance my Cirkus. Any takers? I'm a lumberjack and I'm ok...

Have a great evening!

Tilted on it's axis?

The world, I mean. That would explain a lot...

This is usually the weekend of the first significant snowfall every year.

However:




Sunny, no breeze, 72 glorious degrees at 2:30 this afternoon. The second day in a row.

Go figure, but I'll take it as it comes.

Supporting quality blogging since...oh well, for a long time

I am not a very good writer/blogger...I mean I have my moments, few and far between, but for the most part, eh... I think my blog is more like random graffiti in the ether. But I am, however, A Very Good Reader.

I have blogging/writing heroes, people who are incredibly talented, funny, poignant, thoughtful, informative, entertaining, sensitive, challenging, sharp observationists, and fabulous communicators. I read them daily, usually more than once, and go back into their archives. I try to keep them current in my links. Some of them drop out a bit every now and then (you know who you are!) At the top of the list of people that I read every day, Meg Fowler. And if she's not at the top of your list, then she should at least be on it. Reading her work daily will make your days better. Just like vitamins and orange juice and a good book.

By now everyone knows my position on art and artists and making stuff, and how I think we should support the folks that make great stuff, known or unknown. Every chance we get, we should make a statement with our time, money and energy. There are oodles of people out there doing incredibly solid work that no one knows about. So our mission is to spread the word, support however we can, cultivate and encourage. To that end:



Click the icon linky and vote for Meg's blog in Best New Blog and Best Personal Blog. Be a grassroots contributor and supporter of real art by a real artist. Do this every day, until she wins in one or both catagories. You'll be glad you did. And if she doesn't win, you'll be fully justified in demanding a recount, as the voting is all electronic, and you know how that goes sometimes...

One other thing: go make stuff of your own and share it. Tell you what, send me text or images of what you're doing, I'll post it here if you want. Maybe instead of being a POV site, I'll be a pointer to everyone else, goodness knows we'd benefit more from that than my endless ramblings!

Hope everyone has a great Saturday. The sun's up and it's freakishly warm today, so I'll sit out in the sun like an old dog and store up for the winter. I wish you happy and healthy wherever you are.

Self-Awareness, 4:30 am...

If I acted on half the stuff I intuit, believe, see, know to be true, dream, desire and envision, then I'd really be something.

As it is, I'm just some guy sitting in the dark along with a lot of ideas, untested theories, wild conceptions, mostly uninformed opinions, and a warehouse full of dreams that get dimmer every minute, clouded by mundane realities and the weight of excuses and inertia.

I wonder why I don't take some big chances?

Friday's Challenge

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. ~Thornton Wilder

I stumbled across this quote this morning, and I think there's a lot of truth in it. Some consciousness and a little consistent gratitude could go a long way when things are looking and feeling a little dim or dreary. But I think it might be a little limited in it's scope; I'm learning that recognizing, acknowledging and being conscious of our trash (and accepting it as part of the whole) is equally important to focusing on the treasure.

Hope everyone has great day and has a bunch of reasons to feel alive.

Thanksgiving

A moment of calm before the holiday chaos starts. Wonder what it is that cause us to collectively go bonkers on days like this. Or maybe it's just me.

It's a beautiful day, some sun, not too cold. Good day for a walk. Good day to list the things and people I'm thankful for. A good day (well, everyday is a good day...) for some extended gratitude. Maybe I'll make list later to share. Or maybe I'll figure out how to let everyone know personally.

I wish you all a joyous day, and many things to be thankful for. Hope you and yours are happy and healthy.

Punctuation

A cloudy head and over-all bleh feeling, so this post might win an award for lameage...

My favorite punctuations:

the comma (,) because it allows me a spot to sit and pause and ponder, add to, change direction, expand, contract, restate, amplify, illuminate, or us to catch our breath

the ellipsis (...) because it allows for one to insert the obvious, leaves room for multiple possibilities, serves as a detour for contemplation of a not yet articulated idea or thought, cultivates a space for slow meandering...

exclamtion point (!) because beneath this calm mellow exterior rests a tightly coiled spring, ready to explode at the most unexpected times, because when all is said and done, I am QUITE excitable and expressive!

Now, your turn...

Hope everyone has a good day and feels better than me.

Toast

As in, I am, maybe.

Indications are that I am coming down with (insert highly expressive expletives here) the plague.

Or maybe, it's just this.

So it's chinese herbs, tea, vitamins, crash and burn early. Since all the folks i work with seem to have similar symptoms, we'll hope for no plague and wish for it just to be end of the season exhaustion remedied by a couple of good nights rest and some slower days.

You guys out there, take care of yourselves- vitamins, fluids, rest. Rebel against unreasonable workloads.

Take it easy, allright?

In lieu of an original posting...

Because I haven't had time to come up for air yet, one of my favorite poems, a celebration of the ordinary.

And, coming soon, a contemplation of why do we work so hard so often in our daily jobs instead of our life's work...


The Iceberg Theory

all the food critics hate iceberg lettuce.
you'd think romaine was descended from
orpheus's laurel wreath,
you'd think raw spinach had all the nutritional
benefits attributed to it by popeye,
not to mention aesthetic subtleties worthy of
verlaine and debussy.
they'll even salivate over chopped red cabbage
just to disparage poor old mr. iceberg lettuce.

i guess the problem is
it's just too common for them.
it doesn't matter that it tastes good,
has a satisfying crunchy texture,
holds its freshness,
and has crevices for the dressing,
whereas the darker, leafier varieties
are often bitter, gritty, and flat.
it just isn't different enough, and
it's too goddamn american.

of course a critic has to criticize;
a critic has to have something to say.
perhaps that's why literary critics
purport to find interesting
so much contemporary poetry
that just bores the shit out of me.

at any rate, i really enjoy a salad
with plenty of chunky iceberg lettuce,
the more the merrier,
drenched in an italian or roquefort dressing.
and the poems i enjoy are those i don't have
to pretend that i'm enjoying.
- Gerald Locklin

Unpaid and Unsolicited Recommendation

Cause I'm so freakin' busy I can't write my own post till maybe tonight. Besides, you should take the time to read the REALLY GOOD STUFF, you'll be glad you did.

So, go read this and then go vote here. Keep quality blogging alive and kicking by showing your support!

Have a great day!

Monday

So begins another week. I worked yesterday, clouds and cold and gloomy (the weather, not me, you silly people) and the snow finally started flurrying last night. This morning, a dusting, it likes like powdered sugar on the ground.

Thanksgiving week here in the US of A...time for the big machine of commerce to accelerate. Not my thing you know. Last year for the first time ever I was unexpectedly able to fend off my traditional Nov-Jan Grinchiness (thanks to the understanding, help and positive influence from a friend). All indications are that this possibility exists again this year; it is nothing less than a holiday miracle.

Thanksgiving: time to reflect, appreciate, and openly express gratitude. I don't think I do that near enough. (ok, I reflect a lot, but maybe don't accomplish the other two near enough). Lists may be forthcoming, indulge me. Better yet, indulge yourself. Life can be pretty good if we let it.

I'm off for the first morning walk in the snow. Hope everyone has a good day. In the gaps of today, I'll work on my Punctuation post. In the meantime, let's see if we can fill up the comments with lists of 3 things you're thankful for today. I do so enjoy participatory projects and seeing what other folks are thinking about...

Trivia

Something you may not know about me:

I love the smell of woodwork scrubbed with Murphy's Oil soap.

Join the fun! Share a piece of your trivia in the comments section.

And coming soon: My Favorite Punctuation Symbols

A Don Quixote Interlude in the middle of yet another pointless workday...

Yup, it's Saturday.

Here's a question I ask myself all the time: Why am I ultimately an optimist?

After careful consideration, my answer: Because I have no other choice.

It must be a function of my DNA coded tendency to rebel. I would rather die laughing than live succumbed to all the negative “-tions” that surround us: repression, depression, oppression, resignation, competition, aggravation, etc. Life provides plenty of ways to grind us down, deplete us, annul our spirits and extinguish the light and heat inside of us. I say, just say no. (I wrote that in lieu of what I would actually say, which while accurate and emphatic, some might find graphic and offensive so I'm trying to be a little considerate here...)

I’m no Pollyanna, lalala life is wonderful kind of person. In general, I can be pretty cynical, devastatingly pragmatic, a hardnosed realist, and bitch and moan more than most people I know. I also find it hard to be trusting much of anyone or anything. Some of the time (a lot of the time) things suck, and rightly so. I'm ok with a pig being a pig and not trying to convince myself or anyone else it's just a big dog with a really funny nose.

But in the end, when all is said and done, I choose to be optimistic. Who says the forces of darkness gets to have all the fun and all the power? Not me. But then I have a problem with any dictating authority, be it social, natural or cosmic.

So, optimism. My creative response. As long as I have that, I have a choice and I have a chance. Am I right? Who knows? It works for me.

And at the very least, the sound of a crashing windmill, even if it falls on and crushes me is a glorious cacophony.

Hope everyone has a great weekend, the windmills fall loudly, and spare you to tilt at some more.

And because it was...

It's an early evening tonight for this boy-o. Work days loom large from here till T-giving, so I gotta rest and pace myself.

You guys out there take care and have some fun. Roll strong, laugh and dance and watch the sun and moon and stars and send me postcards from your edges. Don't forget to take your vitamins, brush your teeth and look for the hidden delightful surprises that are so often overlooked. I'll do the same and we'll compare notes!

Well, THAT was fun...

Lengthy and copious consumption of the nectar from the Agave (and I splurged for the good stuff, so it flowed like honey and so far is kind to me this morning)

Hours of unrestrained dancing to unfamilar music at a house party that had just the right amount of crowd and noise

Solitary walk down an empty road in the cold wee hours of the morning, the air brisk and clean

Ending the evening (starting the day?) on a perfect note

Crashing for a nap in a spare, clean, cold, quiet room under a pile of cheap but soft blankets

Waking up, stretching out the kinks, washing up, and going down for strong black coffee and starting the workday, tired, but feeling good

I can't remember the last time I did such a thing, but i do believe it's done me good.

Have a great day. May dancing be involved...

Blustery

Back on the ground on Planet Blehhh after a pleasant detour of Cirkus Dreams. It rained like the end of days last night, this morning dawns windy and cold, cold rain tonight with a chance of snow tomorrow, oh joy. Work was waiting, with all it’s glamour and fulfillment and excitement. Cook the burgers, toast the buns, melt the cheese, it’s all the same and never changes…

Like a lot of things, the challenge is in getting up and doing it. Please enjoy this video snapshot of my emotions during the average workday…

Obviously, today requires daydreaming of warmer climes. And listening to the music of my people. Well, ok, the people that I wish were my people. My people actually are pretty quiet and not musically inclined. Which makes me wonder if I was switched at birth, or if gypsies traded me for an old Studebaker, in which case they made a good deal, cause you could live in that thing if so inclined. All this to say that if I was switched at birth, that would answer a lot of questions I’ve had for a long time.

Excuse me while I go perform some meaningless and mundane task or another. In the meantime, I hope your day is filled with joyous music from fiddles, accordions, guitars, assorted percussion instruments and languages so foreign that you can’t decipher them but they speak to you on a primal level and your feet move of their own accord and a smile creeps across your face and people wonder “now what is he/she so happy about?” (Nice run on sentence, eh? Stay tuned for my essay on my favorite punctuation...)

It’s always nice to keep them guessing…

It could happen, you just never know...

About the Cirkus dream…

You’d have to know a little about me for it to make sense. I’m a real DIY’er, much preferring to cobble together something or another than be a “professional” at it. Money doesn’t motivate me, experiences do. And while I’m an artist, I doubt anyone would categorize me as “talented”, “adept”, “proficient” or “good”. No matter to me, I know how to do some stuff.

My outlook on art in general is so far from the mainstream, it’s laughable. I think the best purpose of art is to help people be open to possibilities. For me, it’s not about the objects created, it’s about doing stuff, interacting, communicating, exploring. Art is just a way to cultivate, or more accurately remember what you forgot about self-expression and self-determination since the time you were about 5. And, it should ultimately be fun.

To that end, my dream of a Wandering Cirkus of Absurd Art and Performance:

My old van, painted carnival colors, loaded up with all manner of fun stuff, completely self- contained and self-sustaining. Hacked and cobbled together low-fi low-tech sound and light and art-making equipment, a few battered folding tables, lots of paper and paint and glue, silkscreen frames, cardboards for stencils, gallons of paint and brushes and inks, nothing fancy, nothing expensive, everything comes from a hardware store, second hand stores, pawn shops. Some kind of collapsible tent, decorated of course. Pull up, park, empty out, set up tables. Come one, come all, paint pictures, make prints, silkscreen shirts, make stencils and take a can of spray paint. Reclaim your empowerment as an artist, spread your message. Music blasting, everyone can contribute, just bring your ipod, jack in your favorite playlist, share it with the people. No rules, no permits, no licenses, just good clean fun, or dirty if you prefer. Kids to octogenarians, everyone’s welcome at the Cirkus. Everyone’s thing is equally important and valid. Make stuff, share it, be excited, make more. Challenge the accepted norm. Make a new norm. Be ab-normal! Express. Tip the gas fund if it suits, and if you can.

My part? Make it accessible, be encouraging. Stir things up. Suggest possibilities. If it suits me, drag out a grill, cook and feed the crowd. Make sure there’s plenty of water. Get people to co-operate and interact. Introduce strangers. Spread the gospel of making stuff for the sheer joy of making. And then, when it gets dark…

Movie time! Guerilla drive-in. I’d have sound, and dvd projection on a blank wall, or on a sheet draped over the van. (cause I know how to do this stuff!) Gather round everyone, let’s watch Amelie, 10 feet tall! Or Pleasantville or artist biographies (Christo? Bread and Puppet?) And at midnight, a bonfire, burning brightly, music switched to slowgroove latenight Cuban and African rhythms, to wind down the night. At some point, audience participation: everyone gets out their cell phone and simultaneously text messages the person they love most in the world. Reaching out across the ether, flooding the airwaves with hope, love and goodwill. In the Cirkus of the Absurd, we use whatever we have to express ourselves, and let the ripples spread.

Finally, late, clean up. Leave no trace, only memories. Everything packed away, silence, stillness. But the feeling and laughter and joy and community remains. Ephemeral but permanent at the same time.

Not that I put a lot of thought into it, but something like that…

So if I roll into your town, would you come? And is there a floor or garage I could sleep in?

If anyone wins the lottery and wants to fund such an adventure, let me know. In the meantime, I’ll be working on details and logistics. Like I said, a boy’s gotta have a dream…

Have a great day, maybe do something Absurd yourself, just for the sheer joy of it. And taking my own advice, I have my cellphone in hand…

Slack

Oh yeah...as in slack-ass.

I was late getting to work, cause I had some Very Important Things to do this morning. Besides, work is always there, it never changes, and it's never all done.

("GASP! He's late AND he's wearing PAINTED SHOES!")

So.

Am I in one of thos "screw it, I'm gonna run away with river gypsies" moods? Oh no. But have I ever told you guys about the Small Ponderings Wandering Cirkus of Absurd Art and Performance? (a boy has to have a dream, a plan, and an exit strategy...I mean, if you don't dream, then what's the point?)

Do you want to hear more?

Have a great day. Dream with abandon. If you can see it, you can do it.

I take my poetry where I can find it...

Not the worst advice in the world:

"He’s one of those who knows that life
Is just a leap of faith
Spread your arms and hold you breath
Always trust your cape..."
-Guy Clark

listen to the Jerry Jeff Walker cover

On this particular Monday

Sun's coming up, the east ridge a jagged black line above the opaque bank of fog down in the holler. Quite the view, I should take a picture, but that would require disturbing the cat that has decided to nap in my lap. Lot of near rhymes there.

On the edge of a contemplative mood. But a busy work week ahead. This should all fit nicely with my inclination to internal conflict: a fiery interior churning and burning and the calm cool collected mostly logical and seemingly balanced external face I show the world. I am usually a tightly coiled spring, though little evidence of that exists.

Or maybe I'm just delusional.

I always wonder if I'm the only that's wired like that, or is it common and most people just don't think or talk about it? I tend to think that some people (not all) have a lot more going on inside of them than we could ever imagine. Layers and textures, all the messy vibrancy of life. The good stuff.

Note that I didn't say the pretty stuff. But I will say the combinations of light, dark, hard, soft, anger, understanding, sadness, joy, fear, bravery, sun, clouds, selfishness, compassion, all the opposites a person can contain makes for beauty. And I'll take beauty over pretty any day. I like depth, meaning and passion. And above all, wholeness.

Maybe this is just a conscious rationalization of my own chaos. What do I know?

What a pondering tangent to be on this morning. Here, let me heap on:

What/who is the center of your universe, and why? I can't come up with an answer for the myself at the moment, which makes me wonder if I'm center-less? This would explain a lot!

Off to walk, it's a perfect morning and Lucy is staring longingly out the door. Hope everyone has a great day, that the world decides to treat you decent and grace you with a few laughters and joys.

Winds of change

Yes, it was a 75 degree, sunny, tshirts, sandals, cold beer, Indian summer day yesterday, the kind of day you want to repeat over and over.

Yes, it is 31 degrees today, cloudy, cold, blustery, and spitting snowflakes this morning, which means jeans, flannel, wool socks, a hoodie, gloves, hat and scarf for a chilling Lucy walk.

But you know what? I have ILLY COFFEE!

Life
Is
Good
Enough

(at the moment)

A Yokel Goes to Town

(editors note: in the right kind of geeky mood, I'm a sucker for Wikipedia. Also, I am prone to getting lost in looking up words in an online dictionary... i must be in one of those moods tonight. I tried to link "Yokel" in the title but it didn' show up, but if you want to join the fun you can find it here)

Ok, one more "country mouse goes to the city" post and I'm done.

I've been places. Hawaii, Phillipines, Japan, Australia, Singapore, Korea, Mauritius (pretty flag!), Spain, France, Germany, all over the US. Lived in San Francisco (4 years, so short, I left my heart there!) and LA (one year, which was 12 months too long for my tastes), have spent time long and short in various places in the country (Chicago, New York, Washington DC as well as the southwest desert and a lot of other places) I like good stuff, never had the resources to actually own any of it, but have an appreciation for fine things. I know how to do a little bit. And I'm where I am now by choice, and love it. It's remote, quiet, uncrowded. Don't have much money, but enough to make the house payment and keep the wolves from the door most of the time. But sometimes I like to go see something else, do some stuff. Just for a change of pace. I don't get out much, need to more, which I am just coming to realize. Ideally, 2 or three short trips a year, say 5 days to a week would be just right. I love to travel, can do it fast and light on my own, and cheap too, because mostly I like to look, walk, see, eat, absorb.

I like experiences, exploring and being in a new and unfamiliar place. But that's a whole 'nuther post.

Refocusing...

So over the mountain and down the valley and up to another mountain today for some different air. Besides photographing, I explored, hunted and gathered, without much regard to budget responsibility. I had a beer and a sandwich on a mostly deserted porch in hot fall sun, and I already told you about the coffee joint. Good beans there, I must say. So the only thing left is the summary of the gatherings, which almost no one will find impressive or even vaguely interesting, but it's what I have to offer tonight, except a weather report, which is that after all day of hot sun, the wind kicked up, clouds rolled in, it rained like hell, now stopped and wind blowing and temp dropping, snow flurries forecasted for up high. I love the speed at which weather changes here, always have. It keeps you on your toes.

Collected treasurse from the day:

Illy Coffee!
Fresh Sashimi tuna steaks!
Giant Greek Olives!
Goat Cheese!
A Sourdough Boule!
Toasted Green Tea!
Takeout Sushi!

Culinary excitement, I can't wait to eat tomorrow (except for the takeout sushi, which I had tonight, along with an ice cold yummy homemade martini, in a slightly wonky handblown glass. I make my own parties...) starting with the Illy in the morning, which in itself will probably prove bloggable.)

Hope everyone has had a good day, a pleasant evening, and tomorrow brings some fun. Me, I'm back to what passes as my normal, working on the woodpile, the tractor, a piece of artwork I'm putting in an auction this week, etc, etc...oh yeah, and eating up the days treasures.

Live and Remote

Finally, the finished Nina Hole Sculpture:





(when I grow up, I want to work for the alternative electronic media...)

Tuning in from remote

I feel so, so, so....Urbane!

Sitting in a funky coffee shop, unknown music (but interesting and lively) blaring. Strong cup of rocket fuel. Books! Alternative magazines! Unknown people doing things and having conversations and stuff. And FREE WIRELESS! And a family just stopped in that has a little girl i'd guess is about 7 or 8 with the curliest hair ever!

Is this how it is for most of you? Without having to drive an hour across the mountains? Tell me, what is it like in these places you call cities? (this place, not so much a city, more a town, some of you would say village. But today it fits nicely for me...)

Went and took a few photos of the finished sculpture. I should blog them here, just because I can!

Apparently, I am easily amused.

Hope everyone is having a great Saturday.

Saturday Morning

Is there anything better than waking up to a warm glowing sun on a leafless fall morning? Well, probably, but I gotta say, it's pretty good.

So, warm, sun, coffee. The weekend lays before me. I could completely fill it with chores, errands, worrying, planning, doing. Or, I could Do Nothing.

Which is what I choose. Of course my Nothing is not void of Something. But I intend to float, cruise, drift through today, without plan or purpose or intent. Sounds lame I know. But the visit to the witch dr. yesterday opened up some more avenues of thought (more accurately, contemplation) which might be healthy for me to consider, or at least more fun than worrying and obsessing about god knows what. Prescription: "relax, let go, let some stuff out. Go get sticks and twigs from Joe, make the tea, quit self-editing, repressing, holding back, take some chances, etc. Your health and well being certainly depend on it, your life might..."

Well. Considering I got home after serving as a human pincushion/direct impression voodoo doll, felt awful, crashed hard and slept for about 12 hours, maybe I need to listen.

So today I'll hop in my little car, and wander the mountains, a solo expedition with the windows down and music blasting. Maybe go find some good coffee where no one knows me. Go to the only good grocery store within an hours drive (one way!) and get something decent to cook tomorrow (i'll take the cooler, hunting and gathering). Maybe get over to Joe's (the opposite direction, but today I say FEH! to time, distance and perceived inconvenience) which is about as close to going to see the sage on the mountain as one can get in the Western Hemisphere. Maybe sit in the sun and draw, read, or maybe...just sit in the sun.

Do I know how to have fun or what?

Hope everyone has a good Saturday of your own. For goodness sake, be good to yourself, give yourselves the luxury of some time. All that stuff that needs to be done? Maybe not so much. In the Kingdom of Small Ponderings, it's a holiday: Do Nothing Day. Do absolutely Nothing for yourself, and if you're inclined, report back here and we'll compare notes. How slow can you go?

Have fun, updates from the outback later...

Coffee Musings (revised)

HA! Look at me, I'm EDITING! Aren't you proud? And stunned with dis-belief?

A mere 45 minutes ago, this post contained a long rambling, detailed and somewhat reactionary exposition on "allowing for possibilities".

Then, a walk, a shower, and some clarity. To wit: I should allow for the possibility (probability!) that I don't know anything about what I'm writing about except for how it appears to me, and for certain should not be so presumptuous as to tell or even suggest to people how, why, the ways, the reasons and my perceived necessity that people should allow for possibilities.

So, to summarize: Allow for possibilities. If you're inclined. And anyone reading this is quite capable of deciding (or not) what that means for them.

Harry Chapin: "there's so many colours in the rainbow..."

Have a great Friday!

Snapshot

not a good one, but how could I resist? Newprint/sumi ink drawings stuck to the side of the kilnshed at school today. And you know how I am a sucker for the sumi...

In which he bemoans the lack of memory...

Yeah, since the last entry, 2 or 3 great ideas for posting. And now, by the time I get a minute and a spot, only wisps, fragments, like fog burning off in the meadow. Apparently my appreciation of the ephemeral needs to extend to my ideas!

At least i remember this: I heard about this on the radio while driving this morning, it's in Charlotte, about a 5 hour round trip drive from here. I'm thinking about going to see it. I think its one of the best uses of art that there is. Symbology and messages to get people thinking, and hopefully doing. I'd love to work on a project like this, but would love it even more if there never was the need. The website is pretty powerful if you have a few minutes and want to reflect.

Reckon I'll go out and stomp around in the sun and see if I can accomplish a couple of tasks before lunch, maybe I'll remember something from the morning inspirations and eke a post of it. Or maybe (almost certainly) something new and different will catch my eye and I'll talk about that. Either way, ok by me.

Hope everyone is well.

"Uniqueness confounds us because there are no rules for guides."

Stumbled onto this piece this am. I'll add this to my "appreciation of the ephemeral" list.

The effect of sleep upon the scribbler...

Good morning! (wow, that was overly perky, yes? well, there you see the benefit of sleep and good coffee, but I hope it wasn't too annoying...)

sidenote: quote from an elderly friend- "every morning you wake up is a good day. if you don't wake up, maybe not so good..."

The good: sleep last night, woke up feeling human. The bad: I thought is was Friday, even to the point of beginning a bubbly Friday post. The good: it's Thursday, so since it's not Friday, it's like getting a bonus day. The bad: gotta spend a good bit of it at work. The good: work should be approaching the edge of reasonable today, and not be the pain it can be.

And there's sun today, brilliant, if cold. Breezes are pretty stiff, but the whole world looks like its been scrubbed and sparkle-y from the rain and fog yesterday and last night. Shiny. And rumour (there's the "u"!) has it that tomorrow, the REAL Friday this week, will be even warmish.

In total, the day is starting out pretty good. Now I'm going for a walk and get the wheels turning. Hope your day starts easy and smooth, and just glides along happily.

Shifting down into the evening

Home after working, the day sunless, the light dwindling and soon time for a walk. A cold one it will be, the breeze is moving pretty good and there's a chilly fog all over the mountain. Finishing coffee to perk me up, craving a rare steak, a giant martini, green green salad with feta cheese, olives, oil and vinegar. Winter food.

I don't know where that came from but there it is...

Little thoughts flitting through my head...an auction piece to finish, scratching around on ideas for a little movie on time, wanting to do a little pocket book or 'zine, and thinking that i'll re-direct claywork and plan to fire again when it's warm, breaking my tradition of cold weather firing. Lately I'm more interested in words and graphics and sound anyways, might as well give into that inspiration and see where it leads.

Gotta go down the hill on a little helpful task tonight, reviving someone's computer. They've been without for a while. I don't know how people do it, i'm addicted to my computer and the 'net like it's crack. If my internet access is out for more than 1/2 hour, I get twitchy. Sad, I guess, but it could be worse. It could be crack. And I rationalize by saying I'm not a TV person...books and the 'net are my thing, my window to the world and my primary form of communicating. But, whatever, to each his or her own.

Need to unplug now and get to walking while it's still light enough for me to navigate. Falling down the hillside, now that might put a crimp in the evening's activities.

Hope everyone is well, warm and dry. Enjoy the evening: make your own party.

Stuff on my mind...

Cause I mean, you know, what else is there for me to write about?

Do you know I had 5 or 6 of the my best entries EVER yesterday? Of course, all in my head, while driving, walking, sitting in a meeting, or standing in line. Sadly, they didn't make it this far. I apparently have a memory problem. Now I'm thinking a little pad, scrawl down a post on the fly, scan, and post the scan whenever i get near an accessible internet communicating device. Gotta think that out...

Other stuff: there is hope for the Republic, hooray! Go, Blue!

And did you ever wonder how miraculous it is that certain people have such a positive impact in your life that you're inspired to reach for the sun and stars with everything you do?

And speaking of sun: where did it go? The morning started warm, bright. And now, fog, cold, and temp dropping. And me, in the interest of fashion, (hey, don't laugh, I DO have taste, even if there is little evidence) deficient in the number of layers to sufficiently combat the elements.

And why is it that time flies when you're having fun, but crawls when the mundane work of daily employment piles up like a mudslide?

Just things in my head at the moment...hope everyones day is off to a good start! Maybe something with substance later, if I can get some coffee and focus and clarify. Until then, this is it.

Found Poetry

The best kind of art: hidden, found, something as basic as writing on a wall.

I found the words written in a grease pencil on a concrete block wall, copied them down, did the brush painting, and typed on the text, then scanned to post.

Then I decided maybe to make a print of it and for some reason, put the orginal in the printer. Why? Who knows...now I have, well, nothing, except a mess. The original, gone, only this image remains.

Ephemeral. I like the idea of that too.



Hope everyone has a great evening.

I'm not saying it'll work...

But you gotta do it. And no one is more cynical about the system than me. If you're in the US, vote tomorrow. The alternative is this:



(via Eyeteeth)

Sunday Bloggity

In for the evening, the sun dropping behind the west ridge right...now. Ok, offically dusk, soon to be dark. And the temp will drop.

A couple of weeks ago, I was suffering blog angst, among other stuff. For now, blog angst seems to be under control if not cured. Content though is another matter. I struggle if I attempt to be entertaining, informative, or profound. It seems to come easier, go better, if I just write about what I'm seeing, doing, reading, and maybe thinking. Some days there's not much seeing/doing/reading going on, or at least it's mundane to the point of snooze-o-rama, and as for thinking, well, I can't tell you everything I think, and trust me for the most part it's not all the interesting, except to me and then it's quite fascinating, delightful, worrying, terrifying, obsessive and optimistic all at the same time.

I can be a complicated man. As can be most people, unless you're a girl, in which case you could be a complicated woman. But I digress.

And it just occurred to me that I need to fix my links and point you towards people that I really enjoy reading and you should too. Somehow the week flew past without me doing that. So, tonight: linkies, new and improved.

Can you tell I'm on the tail end of a homemade 4 shot mountain latte and haven't eaten all day?

Where was I? Oh, I was just going to tell you about today's mundane doings. Life on the hilltop, fall style. Went up to The Tree, sawed and split wood, got the tractor to haul it out, tractor wouldn't start, so got out tools and did a quick tune up of tractor. Up into the woods, loaded, hauled, stacked. Put tools away, put tractor away. Noted knee deep leaves in the dog yard. Shook head, having raked leaves out of there last sunday. Leaves are like laundry and the mail, they're just never done. And, I live up in the woods, ergo, lots of leaves. I do not subscribe to the clean sweep philosophy. And have no lawn, just woods, or not woods. So, raked to move leaves to somewhere other than the dog yard. Try to imagine the irony of leaf raking in the woods and you get a glimpse of my life. Very often a Zen exercise. Good that I have an appreciation for irony, at least on good days.

And today was a good day, sun, fresh air, not too cold. Now I'm in for the night, finishing coffee, surrounded by canine and feline, and contemplating supper.

And of course, there's the links to do.

Hope everyone had a great day, the evening awaiting you is pleasant, and Monday comes gently.

Pausing

Came in for water, vitamins, minerals. Me and The Tree today, now joining forces against the impending dark and cold of winter. We have reached an agreement, and made peace with each other.

Actually, The Tree in all its evolving identities has been mute. I think it was just me that made peace with it.

A pretty decent day.

Lessons from the woods...

Be well, back to it.

Weekend

Bright sun, freezing cold. Time to light the woodstove.

Today is the day I'll be productive and work on the tree, redirect the mountain of leaves on the deck, tune up the tractor, make some kick-ass thing or another to give away at our scholarship auction, cook some kind of awesome supper involving seafood of some sort, work on a movie, write a sharp witty brilliant and engaging blog entry, do a soundtrack of late fall, go to the creek and inventory stones, figure out some cool geeky widget to spread the small ponderings message across the universe, obsessively research artist biographies and projects...

or, you know, sit around, drink coffee, read a book, take a nap, spend time with all my animals and just reflect and appreciate how incredibly lucky I am to be alive and soak in some sunbeams while practicing a little gratefulness and gratitude.

Or something in between.

I wish you all happy and healthy, stay warm, have fun, and have a great day.

Life is good, says he.

Take the weather with you

A summary:

TUES: warm, sunny, no breeze, long walk till dark in tshirt sleeves, very pleasant, dog happy
WED: wind, a mix of sun and clouds, brisk but not cold, hoodie, dog happy
WED NIGHT: clouds, wind, rain like the end of time, dark
THURS AM: cloudy, coldish, no wind, damp ground, jacket hat and gloves required for comfort, dog happy
THURS EVENING: bright sharp sun, blustery wind, multiple layers of outerwear, hat, gloves, scarf required, dog happy
FRI AM: bright sun, steady breeze 24 DEGREEES, dog in her bed, happy to not be outside

Who exactly authorized the climate change, please?

In other news- yes, I know I have to fix links on my limping along sidebar, I'll do it this weekend, seeing as how I can't seem to stay awake in the evening. And I'm reading this book (among others)and you should too cause David Byrne is a creative genius and seems like a good fellow, and it sort of gives a glimpse as to how he sees and thinks. And I look at this website all the time cause it opens my mind like a can of tuna and encourages me to think in a broader scope and smile too, and both of those things are needed.

So it's Friday, YAY! and time to go to work (sigh) but then comes the weekend YAY! and an intensive focus on the Tree Previously Known as Demon Tree but now as the Thank You Giving Tree because at 24 degrees, it's time to fire up the old faithful woodstove.

Have a great day, and read this blog entry cause it is a good story, will make you smile, and remind you that magic can happen in the most unlikely places at the most unexpected times.

My life's work

I dunno. I mean, it's not like I haven't tried to figure it out, and apply myself to it. I get little hints of it, little tastes, thousands of ideas, but forward progress (or even lateral progress?)- not so much.

But, I'm pretty sure it's about making something. Or as I fondly say, "makin' stuff." Which I can run on about at length. Not long enough? Well, here's more.

Oh yes, I believe. Say hallelujah and amen! Can I get a witness?

It's not the stuff that matters, it's people thinking, expressing, problem solving, looking at things differently and ALLOWING FOR OTHER POSSIBILITIES AND MULTIPLE CORRECT ANSWERS! Oh yeah, and being able to do that outside of their own head (he says, knowing that is a huge personal challenge...)

So, I wanna know- what stuff are you makin? How are you going to change your world today?

Stumped? Can't overcome inertia? Feeling blocked? Read this page, then get to work and report back here.

(yes, I know it's long...quit whining, stop multitasking, get some coffee, sit and read the thing and come away empowered!)

Have yourselves a great day. I am off to my day job to earn bread money so I can focus on my life's work: Makin' stuff, and encouraging you to do the same.

Time flies

So, it was May, then I looked up, and now it's November...whaa?

I do believe I missed something. So I'll try to pay more/better attention. And then there's this whole thing about time and speed I want to talk about soon.

But for now, the song I woke up with in my head: (have I posted this before? maybe, i can't remember, but who cares, if so, here it is again. I mean, that's what i was hearing, and if it's repetitive, so be it...)

"You gotta sing
Like you don't need the money
Love
Like you'll never get hurt
You gotta dance dance dance
Like no one is watching
It's got to come from the heart
If you want it to work"

Sun's up, Lucy want's to walk, workday awaits...and oh yeah, there's dancing to do....

Everybody join in, and have a great day!