cleaning out the cobwebs

Time to do a little rethinking and redesign.

I've been blogging for about 2 years; always small ponderings, in 3 different locations. I remember when i started i was going to call it "small ponderings: searching for truth in 20 words or less". Well, that didn't happen so much.

Looking back, most of what I write, while sincere, is just a bunch of thrashing about, trying to get to the (a) point. Rarely successful. Re-reading, I find it kind of tedious and maybe a little pretentious, and that is SO NOT me (or at least not how i see myself...ok, maybe I'm a little tedious, but not at all pretensious). I pick a piece at random, read it, and then think "so what and who cares?" The things I like the best in my blog tend to have the least words. I like to look back and see artwork, unexplained, unjustifed. Take it for what it is, or isn't.

I write a lot about trying to find a wholeness in life, how to reconcile and weave all the parts and pieces into a full cloth. I'm beginning to think maybe that's unrealistic; maybe better to shoot for a harmonious acceptance of all the fragments equally and let them be what they will. Seems like that might be a much more enjoyable situation than constant churning.

Also, I love a good story. I love reading them, I love hearing them. I'd like to be able to write them, 'cause i see them frequently, but it just doesn't seem like a strength of mine. Same with poetry: Gary Snyder, Paul Reps, the Chinese and Japanese nature poets and haiku artists- that's what I aspire to, that degree of clarity and the ablity to paint a picture with just a few words. Again, not my strong point. This is not self judgemental in the least, I think it's an accurate observation. If you want good stories and good writing, you should read the people in my links. They do it much better than me.

So, I'm thinking, after this post, much less words. Maybe more pictures of what I'm working on. I have a dear friend who said once, "don't tell me, show me..." Not bad advice. Sometimes words get in the way. So, more showing.

One of my fundamental beliefs about artmaking is that it's more important to do it than not. Whatever the media. To do it, and not get stuck and labels and expectations and response. More doing, less thinking, less talking, less writing. So I thought I might practice what I preach.

Paraphrasing Danny Gregory: "Do I, in fact, suck? And does it matter?" My answers are: probably so and probably not.

It's more important to do than not. So, here's to the return of doing.

Hope everyone is well and has a great evening!